Thursday, March 28, 2013

Five minutes when you're 23 years old.

[Munich. December 2012.]

“Sometimes you’re 23 and standing in the kitchen of your house making breakfast and brewing coffee and listening to music that for some reason is really getting to your heart. You’re just standing there thinking about going to work and picking up your dry cleaning. And also more exciting things like books you’re reading and trips you plan on taking and relationships that are springing into existence. Or fading from your memory, which is far less exciting. And suddenly you just don’t feel at home in your skin or in your house and you just want home but “Mom’s” probably wouldn’t feel like home anymore either. There used to be the comfort of a number in your phone and ears that listened everyday and arms that were never for anyone else. But just to calm you down when you started feeling trapped in a five-minute period where nostalgia is too much and thoughts of this person you are feel foreign. When you realize that you’ll never be this young again but this is the first time you’ve ever been this old. When you can’t remember how you got from sixteen to here and all the same feel like sixteen is just as much of a stranger to you now. The song is over. The coffee’s done. You’re going to breathe in and out. You’re going to be fine in about five minutes.”
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3 comments:

  1. Oh my goodness I reblogged this a few days ago and I swear it's like she KNOWS me. But besides the 23 part with me being 20 and all ;)

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  2. I get it. 22/23 is such an odd time. Out of school and not sure what to do with the open-ended questions that are presented to us. My friend from college recently sent this to me, and it's so dead on. Such a nice thing to know that everyone else goes through it too :)

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  3. i think about it lately. the fact that soon i won't be 23 anymore.
    but i think to myself even though that morning my coffee's done brewing, i'll brew it again tomorrow and again and again and again

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